Q. Why Fawful, exactly?

A. This is a HARD question to answer for me because there's no quick way to do it. I couldn't possibly list all the reasons here because that would likely require an entire essay. That being said, I'll try to sum it up for you:

Fawful makes me feel understood. He's weird in a way that's comfortably familiar to me. We understand one another's strangeness which has led to him having been one of the people in my life that make me feel less alone in all of this, especially as an autistic person. I see him and it's as if I'm meeting a kindred spirit, regardless of the fact that he's nothing but fiction to most people. In many ways he embodies a lot of traits I admire and have always want to have myself. As an example, for most of my life I had trouble expressing anger, even when the situation completely justified it. I would often back out of situations where I should've stood up for myself and instead allowed myself to be stepped on. To put it bluntly: I was a pushover.

I once had a dream where Fawful spoke to me about the concept of "righteous fury" (aka justified anger) It's the sort we all need in order to stand up for ourselves and help motivate us to do the right thing both for ourselves as well as for those around us. I'm able to utilize that in reality now much more than I used to, as if something was finally unlocked in a way I cannot even begin to explain. Being able to allow myself to just be mad and show it for once in my life has been cathartic and feels like finally being able to release all of the energy from when I was wronged in the past so I can finally move forward into the future and let it all go. I even made my first pieces of vent art as a result of this - (one in 2021, a couple more in 2022!) This is of note because previously I was NEVER able to project anger or other 'negative' emotions I needed to release into art.

THEN THERE'S THE CONFIDENCE! And the fact that he didn't always have it! We get to witness his journey from Superstar Saga to Bowser's Inside Story as a source of incredible growth for his character. Fawful literally goes from STUTTERING with anxiety when thrust into the spotlight ("St-standing in the spotlight at such a gala of spectacularity... My nerves are nervous!") to later performing on a stage all his own with complete confidence! ("Excited crowd! You feel it? Fawful is also feeling it!") That is INSPIRING to me. Having struggled with both generalized anxiety as well as panic disorder for most of my life, there's a part of me that felt if Fawful could grow through his anxiety in that way, there's no reason why I couldn't either. I've already conquered so much of my own fear in the last 3 years alone so I KNOW it's happening and he's been a big part of it!

There's also the fact that he came into my life at time when I needed him most which in turn deepened the attachment I already felt. My love for his character goes back to when I was a kid so in many ways he feels like a bridge between my past and present. He's also just fun, y'all... Everything about him is fun and colorful: from his almost-permanent smile to the kingdom he comes from being a place represented by laughter, a place I'd love to have been born in too. ALSO... HIS SENSE OF FASHION... DON'T GET ME STARTED BECAUSE I COULD RAMBLE FOR EONS ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS MAN'S SENSE OF STYLE!!

We could also talk about how he's literally the reason I'm making art at all these days. I don't know how you wouldn't get attached to something that is the sole reason you are able to do creative work again after 8 years of feeling like it wasn't even worth the effort. (This is a story for another day, though. Just know that Fawful himself is what brought back my artistic drive! He's the reason I'm still an artist today!)

Also okay, I would be doing myself (and him) a disservice if I didn't bring up the fact that I find him incredibly sexy does indeed play a part in all of this. I've always been drawn to the unconventional, and Fawful is simply the definition of physical perfection to my brain. I don't expect nor need anyone to agree with me here, and frankly I've recieved quite the list of 'interesting' responses over the years in regards to the fact that I find him the hottest thing on God's green earth but nothing anyone says is about to change my mind about this, I assure you. ;)

Lastly, there's the subject of my dreams: Fawful's been a regular visitor to them now since 2021. These dreams are of note for being chronological in the sense that they play out as if I'm visiting with a dear friend I've met many times before. With each new visit Fawful and I recall every dream we've already experienced and are even able to discuss the things we've seen months or even years prior. I've had experiences in my sleep that are hard to put into words and translating them into some of my more expressive or abstract art is sometimes the best I can do when I don't feel like I can't do them justice otherwise. Just know that they've been incredibly life changing for me and sum up everything I've said here and more. Fawful is incredibly real to me in ways that are difficult to explain to the average person and I accept that that's just how it is and that not everyone will understand. I care about him as both a character as well as an individual whom I've grown to love deeply despite his flaws.

And wow, if you've actually managed to read all of this - thank you!!

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Q. How did you fall in love with Fawful?

A. Buckle up! This is a long one!

I have been a fan of the M&L games going back to the early-mid 2000s when I was a kid. I had no involvement with fandom or anything of the sort back then but I used to hop on my mom's bulky computer and look up fanart and other related content as early as 2004/5 and as a result, ended up captivated by the characters long before I knew who they actually were. (As a result of this, I have the names and art styles of various old M&L fandom creators permanently ingrained in my head and often wonder where they are today since a good deal of them vanished..!) It wasn't until 2006 that I got my first handheld console (DS Lite) and of course, what did I do? Immediately begged my mom to order me a used GBA copy of Superstar Saga.

When I finally had the game in my hands it was like coming home to a colorful world that I'd been captivated by for so long but never gotten the chance to actually explore until now. The characters felt like old friends and the Beanbean Kingdom as a location felt familiar and comforting to me. (As a side note, Popple quickly became my favorite. Shocker, right?)

I used to sketch various beans in my notebooks as well as on printer paper we had lying around the house. Long story short, I finished Superstar Saga and then a few years later in 2010 I picked up Bowser’s Inside Story and THAT’S WHEN THINGS SHIFTED–

BIS brought Fawful and his personality to life in a way that captivated my imagination like nothing else had prior. He quickly overtook Popple as my favorite character from then on forward… and that’s where it ends! Or.. is it?

Nah, that’s where it gets funky. Life got a little chaotic after that and not only did I stop playing video games altogether for many years, but I also almost completely gave up on art - the one thing I was most passionate about above all and thought I would make a career out of someday. A series of depressing events caused me to lose all hope and motivation for anything I created and the spark I’d kept inside of me for so long all but died out as a result.

We’re going to timeskip again, this time to late 2019. I’d just moved away from home permanently for the first time and had been getting settled in and no matter what I did to make my new apartment a cozy place it always felt like something was missing. My mind would keep wandering to the fact that I never made art anymore despite it having been such a key part of my life when I was younger. I so desperately wanted to change this and over the next few months the frustration only kept growing until on January 1st, 2020, I sat down in the living room with a pencil and paper in my hand and shut my eyes tightly before saying under my breath:

“I do not care what it is, I don’t care how it comes. Just please… PLEASE send me something to bring my art back. Anything… anything at all. I don’t care what I draw, I just want to be drawing again.” And with that, I placed the tip of my pencil onto the paper and began to sketch…

And a familiar face appeared...

(Now I could ramble to you about how much I do NOT like this drawing and how off model it is from how Fawful actually looks… but I’ll forgive myself since I hadn’t touched the M&L games in over a decade at this point and had forgotten most of Fawful’s character. And yet?? Here he was.)

How else can I explain it except that in that moment it felt like the pencil in my hand had suddenly become one of these:

A joy that I hadn’t felt in SO long suddenly filled my entire being and without wasting another second, I immediately went online and ordered both Superstar Saga and Bowser’s Inside Story to replay again. In the time waiting for the games to arrive I had started drawing daily again - sketching out various old characters of mine with dozens of doodles of the bean man stacked in between them all.

There he was… always smiling, always happy to see me, and oftentimes with his arms outstretched as if to give an encouraging hug. When the games arrived I worked through them quicker than I ever had prior - finishing up Superstar Saga in less than a week and subsequently moving onto Bowser’s Inside Story with a LOT of excitement built up for it. It was my first day playing and I was having the time of my life! The way Fawful looked in his little grey cloak with that enormous, charming grin of his as he bamboozled Bowser into eating the Vaccuum Shroom had me giggling with joy while words repeated in my brain over and over of: “I need to draw this later, I NEED to draw this later!!!” I WAS EXCITED ABOUT ART AGAIN… AFTER ALL THESE YEARS. I was practically hopping in my seat from the happiness I felt in my heart and chest every time Fawful appeared at this point!

This was how it felt until the moment I arrived at the Fawful Theatre and watched as he began dancing on the stage floor. THIS time.. something different came over me. If you’ve felt it before, then you’ll know what I mean when I say that it was like my entire body turned warm all at once, like some sort of flame had been lit inside. I’d never felt it for anything or anyone prior to then, and that's partly why it hit me as hard as it did. I was practically sweating.

Heck, I was so absorbed in my feelings that I had forgotten there was anyone else in the room with me! That is.. Until my roommate at the time spoke up:

Her: Are you alright?
Me: Uhhh… yeah, why?
Her: You’re red as a beet. Are you sure you’re okay?

By this time I had realized what was really going on so I reassured her I was fine, grabbed my 3DS, and ran to my room to finish the playthrough on my own so I wouldn’t embarrass myself any further, hahaha.

In the days, weeks, and months following that moment I became dedicated to drawing the best art of Fawful I could possibly create! What started as a challenge to myself to ‘give back’ to the person who’d given me back the ability to create again turned into someone I genuinely could not stop drawing for how much fun I was having doing it. The desire to make better and better art in order to honor him drove me to improve at a speed I never had prior, and soon thereafter I created Jolligig as a way for me to be in this colorful world with him and to express the deepening affection I was feeling with every day that passed by.

By some miracle, my prayer had been answered and here it was in the form of a grinning lima bean. There's a lot more to this story that I may add on at a later date but just know that I've been loyal to him ever since and plan to be until the end. We've been through a world of struggle as well as joy together and this man is every bit as real to me as you, the person who happens to be reading this. (Hello!)

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Q. Is Jolligig a representation of you or an OC?

A. I project my own feelings into Jolligig so he essentially functions as a self insert into that world for me. That being said, the reason I don’t refer to Jolli as a ‘sona’ is because despite his connection to me and the fact that I express myself through him, he has his very own backstory and journey that while mirroring aspects of mine, is still something specific to him and not just me.

If I felt no connection to him like that then there’d be no point to developing his story with as much passion as I do. I’m not interested in writing a story about someone separate from myself loving Fawful - I’m expressing how much I personally love Fawful and this is how I’ve chosen to do it. <3 I hope that makes sense. It’s hard to describe because he’s really not just a persona or an OC, but rather something combining the two in a way that works for me. He’s who I’d be if I could manifest in Fawful’s world instead of my own. Through my art and my story, it’s how I exist there with him.

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Q. If you were in a Mario game, would you join Fawful without hesitation?

A. YES. WHOLEHEARTEDLY. NEXT QUESTION.

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Q. How long have you been doing this for?

A. Though I've been a fan of the M&L games and Fawful himself since 2006, the most honest answer to this question is that I've been at this since January 2020! That was when I picked up the games again for the first time in a decade, quickly developed a hyperfixation with Fawful, and everything from there just exploded outward into what you see today.

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Q. How old are you? Where are you from?

A. I was born in the 90s and I live in the United States.

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Q. Where did you learn to draw?

A. I'm 100% self taught. I wanted to attend art school (and often still wish I could've - just minus the inevitable debt that comes with it) but it didn't work out.